"China Girl"? Yeah, right!

Perhaps, like me, you were fooled by Kate Walker's talk about spending a month in China studying the culture and soaking up knowledge. It sounded oh-so-admirable, didn't it? Well, allow me to be the harbinger of bad news. The only "china" she's seeing is the kind that's underneath expensive desserts. Thanks to the global spy network that aids and assists the media in its never-ending quest to bring you every detail of what kind of toilet paper Angelina bought and how many cigarettes Jennifer smoked today, I just received this shocking photo of Ms. Walker on her supposed "research trip." Absolutely disgusting, isn't it? I guess some people graduate from college and figure their mission in life is complete -- now it's all bon-bons and pedicures. I'm no expert, but that sure as hell doesn't look like China to me. I hate to dish dirt on a fellow Crawlspacer, but this kind of deception is truly disgusting and I wanted all of you to be aware of it. When she comes home, telling tales of moo goo gai pan and visiting Chairman Mao's old stomping grounds, I hope you'll keep this awful image in your mind's eye. Now, if you'll excuse me, I must go write about Jessica's shoe-shopping trip with Lindsay (hungover again -- surprise!).

Weather report: THREE DAYS OF RAIN

I just got back from New York, where I caught three shows and enjoyed plenty of delicious sushi. What did I see? THE WEDDING SINGER (with Stephen Lynch) and FAITH HEALER (with Ralph Fiennes), which are both in previews and will open shortly. And then there was that other show, with that Broadway newcomer -- what's her name? She certainly was a PRETTY WOMAN... Yes, I saw THREE DAYS OF RAIN, with Julia Roberts, Paul Rudd and Bradley Cooper. But the stars were not all on the stage: In the audience alongside me were James Gandolfini, Elaine Stritch and Oprah Winfrey (who arrived with a bodyguard). There were others, too, but all eyes were on Julia, as you might suspect.
First of all, the ticket I managed to get was for the official opening night Wednesday, which meant the media was out in full force. Really, I was beginning to wonder if the Oscars draw as many camerapeople and TV crews as there were on 45th Street last night. It was insane -- and I bet Ralph Fiennes must have been fuming. I attended the matinee of FAITH HEALER Wednesday -- in case you don't know, the play is actually four monologues, with Cherry Jones and Ian McDiarmid each doing one and Fiennes handling two -- and the finale, in which Fiennes finally reveals the ugly incident that sent his character into a downward spiral, was nearly drowned out by the sound of police sirens outside the theater. Turns out the cops were setting up barricades for Julia's opening only a few feet away! The audience was furious and I'm sure Ralph must have been as well. But there are, alas, no second takes in theater. (A shame, too, since FAITH HEALER was extremely well done and compelling.)
Anyhow, for her Broadway (is this her stage?) debut, Roberts has chosen a surprisingly complex piece that requires her, Rudd and Cooper to each play two characters. Act One is set in 1995, when professional wanderer Walker (Rudd) is reunited with his stern, easily rattled sister, Nan (Roberts), in a dingy loft that was once the home of their father and his business partner, back in the early 1960s. What's brought them together is the death of their dad, a world-famous architect who designed buildings and homes all over Manhattan. Walker fully expects to inherit dad's house; Nan is now married and living in Boston. Their tense reconciliation is interrupted by the arrival of an old friend, Phillip (Cooper), who they call Pip. He's a lighthearted type who has become a semi-star in a soap opera. But there is more going on than meets the eye.
In Act Two, we're sent back to 1960, when Nan and Walker's dad and Pip's dad were sharing the loft and trying to get their footing in the design world. Complicating matters was Lina (pronounced LINE-ah), a Southern beauty whose strong opinions and open-minded attitudes make her seem like one of the first of the flower children. I'll reveal no more, except to say that the "three days of rain" changed everyone's lives dramatically.
The show is both funny and moving, and the set is astonishing. A couple of funny opening night incidents developed. At one point, Walker hurls a journal across the stage in anger. Rudd threw the book with so much force it skidded off the stage into the audience. A kind patron returned the book to him, and the actor temporarily broke character to give the guy a thankful wink; the audience was charmed. And thank heavens the guy didn't keep it as a souvenir since it's crucial to the rest of the act! I don't know what they would have done if he'd held on to it. In Act Two, when the rain begins, the downpour is mighty impressive, so much so that some of the people in the front row were getting soaked and had to flee into the aisle!
The script is absorbing, mixing sharp one-liners with some poignant passages. Roberts (who doesn't quite seem to know how to project her voice and sometimes came across as sounding a bit strained) seemed a bit hemmed-in by the character of Nan, who is always trying to hold back her feelings, but she blossomed as Lina, a much more free-spirited sort who is much funnier and more fun to be around. Rudd and Cooper were terrific in both acts, bringing out all the humor and the sorrow in their roles.
It's quite a good show, and I felt like my $110 ticket was a real bargain when I noticed that many of the people sitting around me had paid as much as $250 for their seats!

"We didn't really know where we were going until we got there"

Here is the Between the Lines feature, as promised...
http://zzz.pridesource.com/article.shtml?article=18277

Kalamazoo-based improv troupe 'comes out' with a divine comedy
World premiere of 'Comic Evangelists' set for April 14-15
By Donald V. Calamia
Originally printed 4/13/2006 (Issue 1415 - Between The Lines News)

KALAMAZOO - It seems only natural that an improv comedy team on the road to its first-ever international improv festival might want to bring a video camera along to record its journey. That's just what members of the Kalamazoo-based Crawlspace Eviction did last year - but with a twist.

"Initially, the plan was to bring along Dan Jones, who's shot a lot of our shows to have like a documentary," James Sanford, an original member of the improv group, told Between The Lines last week. "And then the idea came up about what if we made it more of a 'mockumentary' - where we're playing a fictional troupe that's going to Toronto."

And thus was born "Comic Evangelists," an improvisational movie that has its world premiere April 14 and 15 at the Little Theater on the campus of Western Michigan University.

Like their real-life counterparts, the Comic Evangelists are on their way to the 2005 Toronto International Improv Festival. But that's where the similarities end, as the Evangelists are a small-town, church-based troupe that's eager to spread their evangelical brand of Christianity to a much larger audience. It's a journey they, and the actors portraying them, won't soon forget.

"We never had a script, per se," Sanford said, explaining that the actors knew only how their characters related to one another and little more. "There was never any real structure about it. It was all very much off-the-cuff."

While such an improvisational approach to filmmaking can be fun, it can also be problematic, as co-directors Jones and Dann Sytsma discovered after plowing through eight hours of footage. "Because we didn't have a script, [Dan Jones] was really stuck trying to shape something out of it. So we had to shoot a lot of 'book-ending' material after we came back, and a lot of interview inserts that bridged gaps. And in some cases, we had to shoot some wrap-ups," Sanford said.

Stress - and real life - also played an important role in shaping the film, Sanford noted. "As a group, we all spend a lot of time together, but it's a different experience when you're with people pretty much twenty-four hours a day for four or five days. It certainly made for an interesting twist in the film."

Another was the development of a plotline that eventually became the film's focus. "We didn't really know where we were going [with the story] until we got there," recalled actor Adam Carter, who plays Nigel, a troupe member who comes out to the others after arriving in Toronto. As you might expect, the news is not particularly well received. "In my past, I was in a youth group and kind of had a similar experience - coming out in a Christian environment. So that was something I could easily pull from, so we decided that's where we were going with it."

Every good story needs conflict, of course, and this plot development was just what the movie needed. "I think we were all relieved that we had something we could focus on," Carter said.

The comedy isn't meant to slam Christianity, Carter noted, but to satirize certain over-the-top Christians. "About half of us, I'd say, were raised in very religious homes, so we're kind of paralleling the lives we led when we were younger. We actually know how people react and respond to these things."

Although plans call for submitting "Comic Evangelists" to film festivals around the country, Sanford has other dreams. "I'd like the movie to come out and be the surprise blockbuster of the summer and out-gross 'My Big Fat Greek Wedding' as the most successful independent comedy of all time. I'm not staking my future on that, however, but anything can happen."

Crawlspace Confidential!

Read all about it in Recoil:
http://www.recoilmag.com/interviews/crawlspace_eviction_0406.html
(Yes, I guess I am the worrywart of the group... exposed at last.)

By Nicolas Stephenson
Last fall, the Kalamazoo-based improv comedy troupe Crawlspace Eviction performed in front of their usual sold-out Whole Art Theater crowd, but things just didn't seem to be clicking. The jokes weren't funny. The characters were unoriginal, bottom line, they were flat-out bad.
But afterward, the audience still left buzzing with excitement. There were some skits that lived up to the two-year-old troupe's standards, but it was that lame middle part that had fans first talking, and eagerly anticipating a weekend still six months away.

Crawlspace original James Sanford said the reason was the audience that night was let in on a secret. They were crucial extras in the troupe's first film production. Comic Evangelists will premiere April 14 and 15 at the Little Theatre on Western Michigan University's Campus.

"There was a performance which was intentionally awful," Sanford said laughing as he talked about that night last fall. "The audience was directed to respond appropriately, and again, they were wonderful. We got great cut-away footage and wonderful expressions."

Sanford said it was tough to walk that thin line between funny-bad and just bad. Like all of their live shows, and their entire movie, that scene had no script. Comic Evangelists is a full-length improv movie.

"The only thing we really had as far as planning was we had a meeting a few weeks before we left and figured out what kind of characters we wanted to play and how they were going to relate to each other, and that was about it," Sanford said.

The movie stemmed from the group's decision to document some of their trip to the 2005 Toronto International Improv Festival. The original idea was to shoot a documentary. Then Crawlspace director Dann Sytsma suggested shooting an unrehearsed "mockumentary" in the spirit of Best in Show and Waiting for Guffman.

"That sounded like an interesting idea but as it turned out we only shot the mockumentary," Sanford said laughing. "And what happens to us in the film has very little relation to anything that actually happened to us in Toronto, which was a wonderful trip, and we fit in just fine."

Despite the group's spontaneous decision making, the hours and hours of footage actually pieced together into a nice story. The Comic Evangelists are a small town church comedy team, and like Crawlspace they decide to head to the 2005 Toronto festival.

"They basically announce that they will be attending the festival and expect that the red carpet is going to be rolled out for them," Sanford said. "What winds up happening is they do not get the kind of reception they expect and it turns out that a couple of the team leaders have to perpetrate half a scam to even get them on the bill."

Unfortunately, some of the characters have their own motives for the trip. Nigel, played by Adam Carter, is hoping to come out of the closet after living the life of a repressed gay man. Rick, played by Sytsma, is hoping to convince his atheist neighbor Blaine, played by Steve Petersen, that following the Lord's path is the only way to avoid eternal damnation. Father/daughter combo Jerry and Sabrina (played by Sanford and Kate Walker) are making the trip to spend quality time with each other. Their relationship is anything but typical, however, and Sanford said the audience would quickly begin to appreciate their dysfunctional habits.

Much like the fictional comedy troupe, Crawlspace made no arrangements to secure shooting locations. In most cases Sanford said they would just set up in a storefront or hotel lobby and hope they didn't get shut down.

"Even when we went to huge malls in downtown Toronto," Sanford said, "no one ever gave [us] any grief about bringing the camera in and staging scenes in, like, clothing stores… I think they just started shooting, actually. But if you tried to do that kind of thing at Crossroads [Mall in Portage] you'd be kicked out in like thirty seconds."

If the entire production seems a little unorganized, that's because it was. But Crawlspace is an improv comedy team being spontaneously creative, and funny is what they do. Typical movie studio crutches like script, story, and schedule would only put walls around their imaginations. Still, Sanford – who seems to be the worrywart of the group – was concerned that there was no movie despite a weekend of shooting. Fortunately, editor Dan Jones was able to make use of confessionals, and a few are shoots that will have to be stretched or bumped to put together a 90-minute-ish film.

"It's got to be more like editing a reality TV show, where you have to create a story line," Sanford said of the editing process.

Read all about it...

The movie is on its way, and the publicity blitz is about to hit: Look for features on Crawlspace Eviction and the COMIC EVANGELISTS movie in Recoil, Between the Lines and other publications. Alicia Smith from WWMT-3 is planning a story in connection with the premiere, and WKFR-FM will be featuring us on the Friday, April 15 morning show with Glen and Shelly. We'll post links to the stories when they hit the Web.

Get your own weekend

How much improv can you fit into one tiny weekend? The answer is 2 performances at the Whole Art Theater, 1 at Kraftbrau, and a highly disciplined rehearsal. Not to mention the time spent in reverie after the shows, when we lounge about and chew the fat. All in all I would say that 80% of my weekend was Crawlspace related. This is an impressive number when you consider some of the other activities that could have taken up my time. For example it would have been just as easy to stay home and finally tackle authoring the series of self-help books that I have been working on, "Leaving room for disappointment". Or what if I gave in to indulgence and just bought that old horse that I've had my eye on. I could have trotted her all over the Kalamazoo mall and shared a sandwich with her outside of Subs'n'More. All the working stiffs and yuppies who walked by and scuffed at the sight and smell of a grown man caring for a beautiful animal wouldn't even have bothered me. They have no idea what a responsibility it probably is to have a horse. I'm so sorry that I love and care for a something bigger than myself. When will it be acceptable for a man to show affection in public? It just goes to show that the liberals still have a lot to accomplish.
In hindsight neither of those activities would have been as rewarding as a weekend with Crawlspace. Besides, I promised myself I would never buy farm direct again.

"I can't really define irony, but I know it when I see it"

As a child, I had a book called FORTUNATELY by Remy Charlip that I always found quite funny. In it, every good event was followed by something unpleasant: Fortunately, Ned got an invitation to a party -- unfortunately, it was 1000 miles away; fortunately, someone loaned him an airplane -- unfortunately, the motor gave out, etc. So, with this pattern in mind, I present the following:

Fortunately: I found the new Tori Amos DVD -- FADE TO RED, which includes all her videos from the past decade -- in my mailbox this morning! Unfortunately: The promo copy was defective, and while the videos looked beautiful, none of them had soundtracks. Fortunately: One of Tori's best-known hits is titled "Silent All These Years," which made the whole situation laughably ironic.

Tara, Dann and I have our final dress rehearsal of Whole Art's BUG tonight before opening at the magnificent Epic Theatre tomorrow. Check out the show: It's extremely creepy, and we get to share the stage with Susan Rafferty and Randy Wolfe, two of the best actors I have ever worked with.